前にこの手のやつで"Shit Cyclists Say"というのを載せたけど、それと同じようにヒアリング練習してみる。
Barista: A lot of people think being a barista at the coffee shop is easy. Well, it's not. A lot of our customers have very strange and interesting requests.
A: Yeah, can I get a double upside down mocha macchiato with soy low-fat no-fat no-lead. Can you make it taste like Christmas too? Thank you.
B: Hi, can I get a regular coffee and free pass to hang out here all day?
C: Can I get a single origin fair trade blend? Every time you buy a cup, a kid in Uganda gets a free latte. Or is it Ooganda?
D: Yeah yeah, can you misspell my name on one of those paper cups so I can complain about it on Facebook? Thanks.
B: Hey, what's your WiFi password?
D: Not even close. Oh boy!
E: I'll take a fresh Colombian. Colombian: Her hands are so soft! E: Quality beans!
F: Can I get the usual? (Splash!)
G: I asked for no-foam. Does this look like no-foam to you?
C: I told him I didn't need a cup. I am trying to save the environment. AAAAAARGHHHH!
G: It's an aged Sumatra roast and comes in a ---. Very relaxing.
H: Can I get an Americano? I'm writing a novel.
G: I am writing a pilot.
B: I'm a writer.
I: I'm a writer.
B: Hi, you guys are out of outlets this doesn't go anything else.
D: That really is a perfect cup of coffee. They ground the beans between two teenageers at the high school dance.
H: Excuse me, can I get some sugar?
C: Some pure cane sugar?
D: Some microcane sugar?
J(Englishman): What if I told you that I want a tea? Could you do that for me?
D: I only drink artisanal lattes. This one is Monalisa, This is an impressionist portrait of me. Ooh, one of my faves. It's a magic eye puzzle. You guys get to close your eyes to see the image. Yeah, looks like a Centaur wearing a sombrero.
J: It's too hot! I don't want it this hot. Don't do it!
K: It's so caffenated that when I drink it, I unlock the misteries. Life!
D: Yeah, you guys are out of skimmed milk, almond milk, and breast milk. What are we supposed to do?
B: Do you guys offer refills? Like more coffee for free?
H: That is a really acidic blend! Whoo!
C: Can I just get hot water poured over my grandmother's ashes? Mmm, memories!
G: Yeah, there is one secret to a good cup of coffee. The slower the drip, the richer the flavor. Oh that's good coffee!
Ls: Hi, can we get pumpkin spice lattes? Hahaha, alright! M: I'll have one, too.
Barista: Yeah, I think they'll serve those across the street. I want you to get the hell out of here.